4 truths about virtual networking

My favorite definition of an extrovert is “a person for whom heaven is a roomful of strangers.” For an extrovert, such a room is an opportunity to meet and engage with new people, learn interesting things, share observations or humor, and potentially make useful connections. We look forward to and draw energy from these occasions. For us extroverts, the pandemic has been a frustrating and lonely time.

Fortunately for us, the world is beginning to open up. I’m going out to meet today with a group of high-powered women. We’ll listen to an expert speaker, eat lunch together, and enjoy each other’s company. I will most likely sit at a table where I know no one. I can’t wait!

Of course, I’m well aware that not everyone shares my enthusiasm. I have plenty of friends, colleagues, and clients for whom networking is a nightmare. But love it or hate it, for the last two-plus years all of us have had to learn how to work virtually and how to network virtually. We’re still doing plenty of it.

Here are some of the lessons I have gleaned from the wonderful world of virtual networking:

1. Virtual networking is networking. It has the same purpose — building relationships. It has the same basic rules: be interested, be generous, and find ways to be helpful to the other person right from the start. 

2. Virtual group networking is just about impossible. You can Zoom with a group of people you already know well and have a lively conversation. But a group of strangers — forget it. You can’t reproduce that informal little cluster of people getting to know each other, the spontaneous chat with the person standing next to you at the bar, the ease with which you can move from one conversation to another. Break out rooms? Ugh!

3. Virtual one-on-one networking takes more energy than 3D networking. You have to be intentional in identifying new people you have met, perhaps in a virtual group meeting, and proactive in following up with them to schedule a one-on-one. You have to review your contact list and identify the people with whom you would like to refresh the connection. And research has demonstrated that Zoom interactions are generally more fatiguing than 3D.

4. Virtual networking can be effective. Thank goodness! My business would be in big trouble and I would be miserable if I hadn’t been able to sustain old connections and make new ones over the past two years. I now have many clients and contacts with whom I originally connected virtually, and some of whom I have never met in-person.

I’m sure that in the months to come, networking — like much of the work world — will become hybrid. We’ll have more opportunities to make business connections in person, but we’ll still be spending plenty of time on Zoom. Please feel free to chat with me when we’re seated at the same table and equally free to connect with me virtually. We can start by connecting on LinkedIn, or get in touch at ggolden@gailgoldenconsulting.com.